Monday, March 21, 2011

DRAMA

[unedited]

ok how is it going? im glad to know that dad at least is doing well i cant say much for the rest of you cause i didnt hear anything.

Hayes is a trip and what i feel is a frying pan. I'm beginning to see that the Lord does have a purpose in every thing that he does and i am learning more an more about the differences i have to make in my life. so this week Elder Siddiqui and I have three different roes after which he would not speak to me once for twelve hours. i have decided that if i have a fall out with my wife (if that ever happens) that i will do what ever i can to make it right as soon as possible because living with someone in complete silence while avoididng eye contact in hell. The first two were petty disagreences about interpretation of rules and priorities. both times i kept my temper but held my ground and in the end everything just blew over and it was all right. that was not the case yesterday. We were suppose to have a baptism after church but ziggy did not come for sacrament meeting so we did not start the water and the baptism was not announced. unknown to us at the time ziggy was going through a lot of stress and pressure so he didnt want to come. in the end he decided it would be great to have a little bit of peaceand go get baptised. well when he got there late bishop decided to cancell the baptism for 'logistical reasons' as he told me and because ziggy was not wearing a white shirt as he told my companion. then he told us that because of the schedual of the ward we could not do any baptisms until the 16th of April so we have to change 3 other peoples dates also. so ziggy when he was told he cant be baptised today had enough and left crying. my companion gets easily stressed out and he got on the phone and began pouring gas on the fire. soon the zone leaders and the ap's were involved the high council and the stake presidency all got calls and the mole hill became a mountain. i kept my cool through it all but on the way home from church elder siddiqui had a shouting match with the zone leaders and he got even more upset and then he pushed me to far and began shouting at me. it doesnt matter what was said but it is a miracle that he did not turn violent when i rebuke him for using inappropriate language. We went home and eat in silence and sat for a couple of hours. it was so wierd because i wanted so bad to just have a proper fight and get another emergency transfer but i didnt have the bottle because i got physcially ill and could hardly stand. i spent about half an hour on my knees trying to pray but i never started. once i had finally cooled down i went in to apologize. for me the most amazing thing began to happen as i was saying those magical words 'im sorry' i felt overcome with love for elder siddiqui and even though trying to apologize was like hugging a cactus i did it. he tried to cut me off several times saying he didnt want to talk or hear it. when i was done we went out to try to find. of course he was still upset and could not even speak. so we had another call from the zone leaders which turned into another shouting match. one of the zone leaders lost his temper and told elder siddiqui to just go home. so he was dead set on the suggestion and told them to come by later that evening to pick me up so i wasnt alone anymore. by this time i have no idea what to do. after a while the zone leader calmed down and talked to me adn we left it at that. elder siddiqui set up some appointments to say goodbye to some people. as we were walking to them he completly opened up to me and told me of all his frustrations, how he doesnt understand how our mission works, how he doesnt feel comfortable teaching in english yet and how every missionary heres has judged him and he feels that he is just figting against all odds. That conversation was one of the most spirit guided i have ever had. i believe that if i had not made the choice to apologize even though i felt that i was not in the wrong he would no longer be here and i would have a new companion today. i learned alot of lessons yesterday about judgeing and loveing. it feels sometimes that i am walking around with a grenade in my bag and that things could explode at any moment but im glad that at least now i understand a bit more where he is coming from. Since then the phone has been ringing almost constantly with people calling to understand the situation a bit more but at least we are talking again. i fell that the emergency transfer is like a pop quiz that was totally unexpected. patience and temperence, these are two of the most difficult virtues to learn because in the procces many people can be seriously hurt. like elder bednar said it is just best not to lose your temper in the first place. im just glad to know that these are all test from the Lord and that if He wants me to learn something He will get me through it if i stay close to Him. i hope and pray that every thing will go well this next week, Inshala (God willing in Arabic)
Elder Solomon
Dad,
thank you so much for your email i really hope that all went well with revy's funeral. i have heard you speak by the spirit so many times, i know that you did well becasue you we humble and relied on the Lord. let me know how it went.

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